Cheese Quakers

Look at this, two posts in two days! I know, I even surprise myself.

So, you know how my last post says '11:10 pm' or something like that (I can't see it at the moment)? Well, it lies. I actually wrote that at 1:20 in the morning, then proceeded to work until 2, then get up at 5 am. Good ol' Rat and her good ol' work habits. Some things never seem to change.

My back hurts. I know, isn't that incredible!? I just thought I'd let you know, because it actually says a lot about my life right now. My back hurts because of sitting on my bed full of textbooks and documents, working on my laptop in very limited space. The reason why this is my bodily position is because my desk is absolutely smothered in various items, as is my bureau, my hanging chair, the entire expanse of my floor except a narrow footpath from my door to my bed, and even my canopy. Actually from where I'm sitting, looking at the foot of my bed, it looks like there is a child of about 4 lying in the hammock-ish part of the canopy (you know, where the fabric kind of dips and rests over the foot board (or whatever you call the opposite if a headboard)), due to the amazing amount of stuff that I have placed in there for 'sorting later'. To tell you the truth, my room seems to be slowly creeping out the door as well. It's like an evil, living blob of doom that is slowly but surely going to take over the house. But the state of my room is actually a pretty good indicator of my life. It feels like there's this massive toxic cloud of things that need to be done, all of them urgent, all of them important, and my lack of dealing with them is hurting me. And this isn't just schoolwork, although various school things do make up a large portion of the smoggy mass. It also includes the infinitely more important and yet never making it to the top of the list-type things like communicating with my friends, especially the ones who have unanswered emails stagnating in my inbox, ones that I've ignored for weeks or even months. Or things like church committments that I've made, like preparing for Sunday School (which, by the way, has pretty much ended up being me scrambling to figure out the lesson 15 minutes before church starts each week). So there are all these things fluttering about, but my stupid ADD-brain cannot seem to slow them down enough to control them or deal with them in any effective manner. The cloud just continues to get thicker and thicker, ever so slowly descending, threatning to advance completely and choke me to death. The fact that finals are coming up in, oh, let's see...2 WEEKS is not helping matters at all, at all. Oh shoot, how am I going to do this!? *stress, sob*. Wowzahs, I kind of can't wait for this term to be over, so that I might have the chance of starting afresh, and yet at the same time I dread this term being over because it is the only thing I know right now and I fear change. And I'm loving my religious studies and film classes, which are utterly fascinating and I just want to keep learning about forever. But alas, next term has been chosen and neither subject is being repeated, so I shall have to learn to love sociology or anthropology or geography or introductory polisci.

Wow, emotional spillage and a half. Sorry, fellahs. This may have become my new journal, so beware of more melodrama :). Anyway, it magically has decided to become 10:22 (funny how time tends to do that), and I have to do at least one more thing before I go to bed so that that cloud doesn't choke me tonight. Toodles,

Ratty

P.S: if you're bored and/or procrastinating, may I present you with the best site ever: http://www.catsinsinks.com